Rough Day Yesterday.....

It started of with swimsuit shopping for Jordan. We got suits for the other two on Sunday, but Jordan didn't find anything, so we headed out again yesterday morning. Swimsuit shopping is never fun...unless your a size 2, which neither she, or I am. Luckily though, she was able to find something at the 2nd store.

Then I had to take Kayla to the Pulmonologist. A few weeks ago she had a physical, and her Pediatrician suggested we go see him since Kayla has some difficulty after she exercises, and she was hoping to go into the military after graduation, he thought it would be a good idea. So we go, and she has some lung function tests, and we wait for the DR. He comes in and starts talking to her about boys, and her future plans, the difficulty she's been having, ect. Long story short, he tells her she is most likely going to have to skip the military because most likely they won't take her due to her condition. "Um hello? What condition?" He says that her lung function tests show at least 30% diminished lung function...with a breathing treatment, and 50% diminished with no meds, and she has asthma. Where the heck did this come from???? I mean, she had asthma as a baby/toddler, so I know what asthma looks like, but I have never seen anything remotely looking like asthma with her. He did tell me that from her tests, it seems to be something she's been dealing with for a while, so her body has most likely learned to compensate for it, and it probably isn't overtly obvious....somehow doesn't make me feel much better as a mother. So now she is on an inhaler twice a day(the strongest one they have, and has a rescue inhaler as well. She just so happens to be going to Texas on Saturday to visit her dad, so we won't be able to follow up with the DR until August, but hopefully when we do, the meds will be doing the trick.

So after a 3 hour adventure to the DR office and pharmacy, we get home and the girl have to get changed for Brandon's viewing. They leave about 6:30, and are back by 7:15, and all distraught, and in tears. It is very difficult to try and explain why this happened when there really is no explanation. It beaks your heart to have your child say "why did it have to be Brandon? Why couldn't it be me?" I don't have any answers to give them. I don't know God's plans. All I could say is that one day, we will know and understand why things played out the way they did in this life...although that doesn't make us feel any better now. I can only tell them that everyday it gets a little bit easier to deal with. I know it is something that they have to go through, and deal with the heartbreak, but as a mother, it is difficult to watch.

Today is the funeral, so I know it will be even worse for them.